Friday, February 22, 2013

I survived a week without Instagram!

The question of these last two weeks has been:
How was it, you know, without Instagram?! 
I have a few thoughts and some insight into my heart about those seven days without ol' Insty:

1. Nothing too monumental happened. For some reason, in the back of my mind, I thought I'd have some brilliant revelation I could tell the world about. #didnthappen

{Okay. Pause for a second. This is a total side note but I have to write this. PK is in a class at church and they memorize Scripture every week and I can hear him in the other room reciting it. Just when I thought Macklemore's The Heist album was music to my ears, Macklemore ain't got nothin' on hearing my husband as he spends the last hours of his day writing God's Word on his heart.}

2. I really did take this Instagram fast to heart for that week though. I set some ground rules for myself going into it which included not taking pictures during that whole time. Ok, that was the only rule. I told myself "No #latergrams." What would the point be if I was still taking pictures and editing them on other apps? I might as well have been instagramming. Taking and editing the pictures is what takes the most time. You know, getting the perfect angle, and making sure it has the perfect filter/font/frame. I'm not saying this is bad by any means, but I just wanted to check my heart in it all. Was I taking too much time on this? Could I be spending my time doing something more productive? Was I spending all that time on snapping and editing pictures to be better than other people so I could feel better about myself as I played the comparison game?

3. Now that I am back on Instagram, I realized that before the fast, I was walking around with Instagram eyes instead of asking God for His eyes when I saw the world. I feel like the week off realigned me and made me think about my purpose behind posting pictures. To address the questions above, time spent wasn't the issue, it really was my heart. There were times when I definitely wanted to be better than other people I follow. Ew. I hate saying that out loud, but that's where my heart was sometimes. And I am sure it will be an ever-lurking temptation. In my week-long heart search, I asked the Lord to humble the snot outta me and that if I am posting anything it would be to share my life with people I love, encourage, give glory to God, inspire, and give myself the freedom to be creative. I asked Him to make me quick to realize if it's something other than those things, and if it is, it's not being posted.

4. The week off made me think about my purpose behind looking at other peoples' pictures. In my heart of hearts, I just want to revel in how awesome God is through peoples' pictures. I want to know friends' lives in this unique way. I want to celebrate with people from afar. I want to encourage and lift people up. The thing is that before the fast, I think comparison got in the way. Again. So, the time off was good to get back on track with that, realign my heart with this as well, so I could hop back on Instagram with the right motives.

5. Lastly, this week put me in check with making sure I feel worth something not because of how many people like or comment on my pictures, but that my worth comes from the Lord.

I know all of this might seem extreme, so call it extreme if you want. S'all good. But, I want to be a woman who has pure motives even in the things that seem like no big deal to some people. Because this was a big deal to me and at times my heart was not in the right place.
I want a pure heart in it all.

All of this to say, I am glad to be back. The break was nice, and I guess some monumental things did happen in this heart of mine after all. 

1 comment :

  1. Thanks for sharing these thoughts Christine! Inspiring!